You get the point, which you can use to gouge out the gray matter infected by this insidious excuse for a comedy. Taxi is a remake of a French film, and another reason for the French to hate us. Talk about a Weapon of Mass Destruction, this stink bomb fills the theater with an odor that lingers long after the credits roll, if you manage to last that long. Read the rest of this entry »

It’s impossible to review Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith as just another movie. Twenty-eight years in the making, three sequels and two prequels later, countless billions at the box office and enough merchandising to choke a Wookie, the Star Wars franchise is more an event than just 140 minutes of film. Read the rest of this entry »

The disorientation and isolation of being a new immigrant in a strange country are explored in “The Last Resort,” a thoughtful new film from director Pawel Pawlikowski. Making his feature film debut, Pawlikowski delivers a film that looks and feels so real it could be a documentary. Read the rest of this entry »

In New York, you always hear people complain there is never a cop around when you need one. Try telling that to burnt-out New York Police Detective Jack Mosely (Bruce Willis), so dispensable his superiors relegate him to babysitting crime scenes. With a slight limp and a legal alcohol limit constantly coursing through his veins, Mosely is among the walking dead. When he’s not passing time waiting for retirement, he’s compromising evidence looking for a drink. Read the rest of this entry »

Of all of life’s romantic pleasures, to me the most erotic is passion. A lot of people mistake lust for passion. Real passion goes beyond superficial sex. It totally inhabits the individual, rendering them helpless. Real passion creates a heat wave that sears through everything else. Read the rest of this entry »

It’s that whole “Circle of Life” stuff that’s supposed to make sense, but sometimes doesn’t. Sure people gotta eat, but do they have to eat while watching a movie in a theater? I know theaters make their spending money on the over-priced snacks and watered-down sodas, so it’s a given as long as food is available, people are going to eat. Read the rest of this entry »

Imagine a not-so-distant future where retina scans turn video billboards into personal advertisements. Where streamlined vehicles careen down a programmed highway in the sky, leaving the occupants free to do whatever they please. Where police can predict when a murder will take place and stop the crime before it happens. Read the rest of this entry »

Talk about buzz kill. No, really, talk about it. Discuss, and I’ll be back in a few moments with something to snack on and read another entry from “Emmanuele’s Wicked Tales.” Sorry, must have gotten lost in another bad 1970’s drug flashback, which is where you’ll find “S.W.A.T.,” an action-based crime drama based on the marginally persuasive television show. Read the rest of this entry »

Shot in Belgium in 1970, “Daughters of Darkness” was director Harry Kumel’s only English-language feature. Due to it’s naughty nature, the film was trimmed more than 12 minutes for its United States release. The DVD (like the laserdisc) restores the censored footage, but after more than a quarter-of-a- century, the film’s shock value has been diluted. Read the rest of this entry »

Decidedly darker than its predecessor, “Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets” is also more satisfying and entertaining. Mere mortal words will have affect on your decision to see the film, but for those on the fence, there is good news and bad news. Good, because “Chamber of Secrets” is everything a sequel should be and more. Read the rest of this entry »